Most will not and cannot comprehend and accept the fact that their athletic careers are over. I say comprehend because it is something which many top-level athletes in Division I never fully prepare for.
The feeling of loss and failure. The overshadowing memories of accomplishments and triumphs. The reality that life will never seem to be as complete as it was during our times as student-athletes. These things don't go away overnight or even over long periods of time for some "ex" student-athletes.
It has been difficult to adjust to a world without the competitive nature as sport. Life is eerily different and sometimes is seems there is nothing I can do to replace what once was so much a part of "me" as my own face or name.
I'm not going to lie or try make you think "poor me,", because I am very lucky. I am receiving an education that I am proud of. I have met and learned from people who are different than me in every way. I've had experiences that I wouldn't trade for anything. All this probably would not have been possible without my involvement with sports.
Still, I cannot bring myself to watch a volleyball match. I tell myself that I can't watch because I hate watching things I think I should be apart of. But in all honesty, it is because my volleyball career is over as a collegian and no surgery or help from a teacher is going to change that.
Now I find myself becoming the best "student" or "waitress" no longer “volleyball player” that I know.
Sport isn't just a game, it's been life up to this point and without it I wouldn't be the same. Bottom-line is that moving on is something that must be done.
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